Sunday 16 December 2018

2018 In Review

This has been an exceptional year.  We finally concluded Mikey's adoption at the surrogate's court of New York in lower Manhattan.  The surrogate's court has nothing to do with surrogacy in the sense of our previous journey to expand the family.  Its primary purpose is to deal with legal issues relating to wills and estates but for some reason it also handles adoptions.

We need to maintain privacy about the reasons for such a long delay but it was entirely out of our hands.  The final ninth months or so were less stressful because the outcome was  almost certain then but we had to deal with all kinds of administrative frustration: many forms such as home studies and police clearances had expired due to the length of time that had passed and all had to be redone, adding more to the cost.

Even the final ceremony posed some mild drama because I was supposed to be in Europe with Hatty so I ended up flying back to New York for just under 24 hours before returning to London.  However, in a grand courtroom (with a chandelier from Tiffany's we were told) it was finally done.

Our experience was not typical so should not put anyone off the process.  We were just unlucky for a while but of course have ended up the luckiest people of all.

Hatty's year was already different because of her new school.  It is a very different experience from her previous school.  The school has been relaunched with new management and a completely new building.  Hatty's class is a so-called Gifted and Talented class that pushes the kids further and faster and is much sought after in the public school system (for the benefit of British readers as usual I emphasize that public school here means state school not a private school).

Unfortunately, it is unlikely that this school will carry the program forward into the middle school years so we will likely have to apply to other schools.  Most middle school applications are made at the beginning of 5th grade - i.e. next year - but some already take them and we have filled out our first form already.

Her favorite subject is gym and she scores consistently high here.  This year the feedback is that her reading is the most advanced academic subject and is about two grades ahead of the target.  The vocabulary they are given is very challenging and it can be a challenge thinking of sentences when the target words are things like 'melancholy' and 'wistful'.

Math has been interesting this year.  The way this is taught now is completely different to how most parents learned it and I know this causes a lot of frustration at home.  I understand the rationale for it -*because it emphasizes problem solving and understanding instead of learning by hear.  I was amused though at one point when the teacher said she was just going to do old-fashioned times-tables because they just needed to know 7x8 quickly and not waste time working it out (e.g. as 7x4x2).

Her core set of a friends are two girls (Hannah and Natalia) and two boys (Ryan and Julien) but at parent-teacher evenings the feedback this year, as every year, is that she is friends with everyone and can bridge the gaps between any groups or cliques.

Some changes to note this year: cheetahs apart from Fetch are out and everything is now about birds.  Her preferred career is to be a YouTube star; I'll let you make of that what you may.

Our vacation route was more limited than ever this year but it was still ambitious and not without its share of vehicular problems (the truck needed it brakes replaced and the RV needed some work on its suspension).  Next year we have resolved to make it even more limited with just a couple of states on the route.  We have even started talking about replacing the grand tours with more stationary holidays if we were to get a house.

We did not manage a trip with all of us to the UK.  I took Hatty around her birthday but because the adoption was not yet finalized we could not take Mikey.  J had to return alone for his father's funeral - a sad occasion made worse by being the first time he had really been away from Mikey.  We did have plenty of visitors though including J's sister and her family for much of the summer, J's mother, my parents and of course Aunty Circles.

Our plans for a trip later in the year were thwarted when the kids' passports went missing (they had been left back in New Mexico) so we missed the small window Hatty had to get out of school (with Middle School applications in mind it is a particularly bad idea to take them out of school in fourth grade).  We should resolve this in February 2019.

My own travel ticked up a bit this year with more Asia travel than previously because in February I was made the global head of my department.Video conferences are difficult from New York when there is a 12 hour time difference.  This year I visited 12 countries, traveled through 38 airports and traveled the equivalent distance to 7 times round the world.  There are two more flights to do - out to Arizona for Christmas and then back just before New Year.

There have been ups and downs along the way but this was a very good year.  It is difficult to be too optimistic based on the news but who knows.  I will try to be positive and look forward to some more successful traveling, good schools and the Mueller report.