Our initial trip to the lawyer a few weeks ago was something of a disaster. The young lawyer refused point blank to see us as a couple and so I went into the room first. I told our story as she sat stony faced opposite me. It's not that she was being deliberately unfriendly, I think it is more likely that she was just young and out of her depth, but it still felt bad. At the end she confessed that it was not something she could advise on and that she would pass on the details to the partner in family law.
The partner did get back to us within an hour and reassured us that she would be able to take on the case. We had the trip to go see the scan first but scheduled a meeting with her this week. This initial meeting went well - the focus was on how to formalise my relationship in UK law with the child. She promised that she would research the Californian law and get back to us. We felt good that we were finally making progress.
The next day was less good as she explained to us how the UK law regards surrogate births and what it might mean for us. Apparently the Embryology Act is one of the few that was not updated following the introduction of Civil Partnerships and there is a clear distinction between a marred couple of opposite sex and us. I don't want to dwell too much on the details because it is too early to be confident about anything. She will be consulting with barrister friends and doing more research.
Everything will be fine we know, it's just a shame that it is not as straightforward as we might have hoped initially. We have consoled ourselves with the thought that if the UK authorities harass us too much we can go claim asylum in California where our status as parents is unambiguous. Not a bad plan B after all.
